and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize