yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
