Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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