guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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