you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
