batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
