My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
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I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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