So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
