and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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