I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
