K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
