I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
