Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
