the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize