margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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