In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
