I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize