I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
