in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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