u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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