even my farts smell like vagina
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize