Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?

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(404): View more from Georgia

You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up

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(330): View more from Ohio

I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it

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(727): View more from Florida

Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices

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(240): View more from Maryland

i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight

(202): View more from Washington, DC

HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!

(240): View more from Maryland

it expires tomorrow

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