what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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