he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
