I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
