I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize