New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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