so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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