So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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