Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Semen is not good for contacts.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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