Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
try to milk me bitch
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
