Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
