so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize
