i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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