Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i can't believe i had my finger in that
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
