Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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