oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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