Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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