hotel room ftw
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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