But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
