i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
