Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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