There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
