Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
where are you?
Hypothermia
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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