I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize