I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
