If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
