Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.