I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
bring money and cleavage
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
