you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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